Tis the season….

      For Dracula, that is

I  recently decided to read the original Bram Stoker, and Iwanted to share a few thoughts.  I don’t know why I never have read it before, and  I think Frankenstein is next. Two classics for the season. I know I was supposed to have my cliché story done today, but I just don’t think it is ready.

So I thought I would write about the clichés spawned by Dracula. I was surprised, actually, that Dracula didn’t seem cliché from all the references and parts that have been stolen from it for the last century or so. I was very impressed with Stoker’s writing, his descriptive style flowed smoothly. The plot moves along from diary to diary in a fantastic way. The classic seemed original. Who knew?

Vampires are very popular again, and endless worlds and theories have been created to support each authors view. The clichés spawned by Dracula and Dracula wannabes are endless too. I have collected just a few. I particularly like the first one, it has a very good point, I think we would notice that many deaths.

Vampires must kill regularly to feed. Anne Rice does this, but consider — three vampires in New Orleans killing at least once a night for sixty years. That is over sixty thousand corpses! In a city with a population of less than a quarter of a million! The Civil War was less devastating to the city!*

Sloppy eaters. I love cioppino, for example. Love it. But when I eat it, only a few drops might end up on my lips and shirt. Why would vampires be any different? Or if you use the analogy of addiction — do addicts spill cocaine? Not deliberately they don’t! In fact they’ll go to great lengths not to!*

Bug-eating servants. Renfield was innovative in his day. Devouring live insects is no longer edgy, but cliché.*

Vampire males who mope about being vampires. Okay we get it, you don’t like biting people for your next meal but please don’t push undead angst to the limit.* – I always liked Buffy more than Angel. As much as I enjoy David Boreanz, he was a bit broody for me. Spike, on the other hand, was quite entertaining.

 

All vampires are beautiful. I get that they have been around long enough to figure out what makes them look good. And I suppose vampires, like the rest of us,  tend to be drawn to beauty, so they are more likely to turn attractive people. But all of them? Unearthly beauty? I don’t think so!

Weary vampire falls in love with human, manages to find true love. While popular, the many twists and turns it takes for the spunky human to capture and keep the vampire’s interest, not to mention the contortions the author goes through to make a reasonable ending where they get to live happily ever after; seem, well, cliché.

Money. Along with beauty, I find it difficult to believe that every vampire has the business smarts of Sam Walton and manages to amass a fortune through the centuries. It is more likely that they would be living in poverty, and highly likely they would be criminals. Mugging would get them a two-fer: dinner and a wallet.

And then there are the “sparkly” vampires. You don’t want me to get started on those. Not to mention the movies and tv shows taking Dracula’s name and legacy in vain. I think that might be another post! Meanwhile,

for anyone looking for more vampire lore, check out Louise at Baby Gates Down and her series Vamps A-Z

 

*weird things

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3 Comments

Filed under Cliches

3 responses to “Tis the season….

  1. This is great! Love this post. You’re so right about the high death tolls inflicted by the undead. If I was to write a vamp story, they’d have to have the digestion of reptiles-have a meal, don’t need to eat for a few months.
    Have you watched the movie Near Dark? It’s very gory (of course) but takes a more accurate angle on the vamp lifestyle – they drive around in a run down car, look really gross – kind of homeless/biker look – and behave like criminals. Yes, you do have a human/vamp love story but it’s definitely a less glamorous life than in many depictions. No camp foreign aristocrats here!
    Great post.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Near_Dark

    Like

  2. Angelus was so much more entertaining than Angel. I always loved Spike, though.

    I much prefer my vampires to be an opportunistic bunch of people who live on the fringes of respectability. I don’t like this whole adjusted to everyday life with a side of drinking blood approach at all. No sparkling vampires for me, thanks.

    Like

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